Multiple Syndromes

It may have come to the attention of many over the years that the order in which one was born plays a significant role on ones identity and personality. Many of these stereotypes are deeply embedded in the position one plays in a family that eventually many of these stereotypes become reality. In respective of the turnout of a child, traces of the expected personality and behaviour tend to linger within. It's no surprise that these identities are bounded by convention because they are overlysimplified into a sole idea rather than weighed by their complexity and multidimensions.

The first child is always known as the experiment which is the only composition without a lie but as the child grows up and the family tree branches out, a common side effect is that of the expected leadership role the child must fulfill with very little room for error. Said child learns at an early age to be self sufficient and independent because the leadership baton that has been passed on to them requires the necessary care and attention for the younger siblings who are often in sincere need of guidance. As failure is not an expectation of any child, it is one that a first born is strongly led away from with no opportunity for flexibility. The saddest reality of the oldest child is that he or she forced to grow up rather quickly without enjoying the many pleasures that childhood presents.

Middle children even by their status and positioning of this write-up are placed in an awkward position. Depending on the number of children in the family, they may frequently think themselves as the odd one out or the neglected one and their response may be viewed as resentful. Personality wise they are often steroetyped as being negative or not outgoing from the result of feeling like an outsider when in reality they may turn out to be very social and interactive individuals when given the opportunity. A middle child unbeknownst to many are trailblazers at an advantage point that allows them more flexibilty and freedom to express themselves.

One of the many syndromes of being the last child is the frequent subjection to comparisons of the older children and the unrealistic expectations to fill in shoes. You’re expected to make your own choices and show signs of independence however your individuality is constantly overshadowed and overlooked by the previous strives of your siblings. Yet it is not only impossible to follow in their footsteps because the concept is so righteously antiquated, as one should mold into their own being, but it is because it is so stifling. Stifling in the sense that it makes one restricted, bounded, and ultimately rebellious. Another syndrome and stereotype of the last child is often the idea that we are entitled and if you also happen to be a millennial it is an identity that is monogrammed with letter ‘E’ on the left corner of your shirt. Close to your heart so as to be symbolic. As the last of four I have tried failing to convince by brother and sisters that my parents kept trying until they got the perfect one even though its common knowledge that I was a happy accident, a blessing. We all know the term too well that is used to express of a child that came unexpectedly and it is always a blessing or miracle. However the miracle I appeared to be, I have always questioned why my parents didn’t stick with the three they were so pleased with and set me up in a no-win situation. Growing up with siblings with an age difference spanning at least a decade, I never had the opportunity to grow and weave my own path. All three of them of them are wonderful people to look up to and have their own unique identity but I’ve always wondered if it would have been easier being the last if I wasn’t last behind.